KingLou Drops Science 2.0

I am so sick of this retarded commercial with the kid break dancing for his dad/unknown person while this mystery person films it with his camera phone. And then it shows all these people around the world watching the video in all these different aspect ratios and on all these different devices. Like all these buhddist monks would come running from whatever kung fu fight they would be engaged in to watch break dancing. Because break dancing is new and hip. The kids can't get enough of it. And business men want to watch it on their blackberries. And its playing fullscreen huge on a TV in Times Square. I can't even begin to cover why this is retarded. Mainly camera phone video sucks and they shouldhave picked something cool to show instead of a nerd uprocking.


WEAK

Holy Jesus was I depressed this weekend. Thats two weekends in a row now that I've been in the grips of this nastiness. Not good. Kind of culmination of a lot of different thing piling up at once but seriously I don't think I've been that inconsolably depressed in a long long time. Felt like college again. We've been kind of overwhelmed with crappy news lately. First Jodi got the stomach flu that Ace & I had. The funny thing about that was that Jodi refused to take my advice about what do to for the illness even though I just gone through the same thing. I had to pester her to use the heating pad and advils. She is seriously resistant to all suggsestions "Lou". Secondly Jodi didn't get the job she was really hoping she'd get over the last few months. It was kind of a blow. She had a lot of people pulling for her to get that job and things were looking good there for a while. Then suddenly things went a little weird and boom. No job. In an unexpected turn they did give her a lead on another job which has certainly never happened to me on a job interview. I'll be glad if I get a rejection call about the job. Usually it's like "Man, I applied for that a while ago... oh they took it down."

My comedy mind has been racing lately. Reviving old ideas. Thinking about new ones. I need to produce something of comedy worth soon or I don't know what will happen. I was complaining about this recently and a friend tried to cheer me up by saying "Lou, today is the 1st day of the rest of your WHY ARE YOU CHOKING ME?" Which I thought was funny. But I still felt compelled to reply "Today is the first day of the rest of your inability to make your dreams come true due to the crushing demands of your life and your own inability to produce work." This statement basically brought the discussion to a close.

The search for a school for Ace continues to appear totally fruitless. I don't know how people get their kids into schools in this city. It's basically totally criminal how overwhelmed the school system is. In other Ace news he has really exploded verbally. Just talking a mile a minute about total crap. It's pretty entertaining when it isn't totally annoying.

This weekend started off ok. Jodi had to work pretty much all day for some performace art event so Ace and I made the best of the day. We went to the local diner and had a nice little brunch. Ace actually fed himself and was well behaved. Afterwards we went home and chilled out because it was really windy and cold outside. We basically hung out in the house until the evening where I bundled Ace up in some winter gear and took him to my fellow Gunshow alums house for a party. I knew I wouldn't be there for any actual "partying" but I wante d to get out of the house for some adult action. Ace had a really good time and I got to recharge my dude battery. Just when people started to get there we had to leave. Ace basically crashed into super tired kid mode but was still a champ as we hailed a cab on 4th Ave in brooklyn. After Ace went to bed I sat down to play some F.E.A.R. on the xBox360. About 20 minutes in I started to feel really nauseous. At first I thought it was the same kind of motion sickness that I got during Half-Life2. I kept playing and it kind of went away. But by the time Jodi got home i knew something was way off. I felt really weird in the lower gastro-intestinal region and pretty soon realized that I was going to be in for a long night on the toilet. Sure enough by 1am I was barfing and shitting my guts out. To top it off Ace had the same thing minus the barf. All Sunday morning I was crapping wreck. Ace was in a great mood except for the fact that he needed to be changed once every couple of hours or sooner because he was filling his diapers with bags of liquid poop. It was seriously nasty.

What really bummed me out was that I missed Team Fernandez's 1st show of the new Project season. Since that's my only improv performing right now I feel every one I don't play in. We came in 2nd even without me.

Now 48 hours later I am still not sure what we ate or were exposed to but it better stay the hell away.

This time I lost it to a "invalid password" while I was logged in. Just left it open for a long time and when hit send it said I entered an invalid password. The login boxes were there with my info all filled in and I hit enter and it took me to the admin page. Entry lost.

anyway. Team Fernandez performed. New season of 24. Nanny doing weird things. School starting. Hope thats enough for ya. I'm not typing it in again.

So as this weekend crawled along Ace showed some signs of getting a cold. He was coughing a ton and generally being weak and feverish. Today he was really ill. We had to give him all kinds of decongestants and stuff for his fever. He would go from crummy spirits to running all over the place. We didn't do anything all day except eat and watch kids TV.

In the evening I had another improv show. This was an all captains show as well as 2 final performances from the 2 leading groups. Only 4 captains showed up but we played and did a good show anyway. We almost did not show at all. When I got to the theater it was totally closed. The theater manager has forgotten his keys and had to run back home. No one knew that so we all just stood in the rain. Eventually he showed up and the show went on.

Captains Team Highlight: 4 Men working together in a company. Someone came up with the idea for a fake beard you wear that is actually full of soup. So you can eat secretly and still enjoy having a beard. I loved the idea.

There was also some weird Douce talk and some obsession with MySpace top8. I was totally unclear as to what the top8 were at first. Now I know. In a classic Gunshow move I stabbed Tom from MySpace in the neck with a shiv when I was in jail.

I came home to Jodi mildly worried about Ace. He had a 104 fever. Turns out kids tend to run higher fevers and 104 isn't too terrible. He seemed ok. I was worried for a minute but a quick call to my mom and a WebMD check straightened me out.

Tonight Gunshow performed it's first show of 2007 as part of the show AcidTest. AcidTest is the show that my friends Ryan and Dustin produce a couple of times a month of some of NYC's best improv groups. The benefit of AcidTest for groups is that it's shot with at 3 camera setup and recorded, then converted to podcast. And according to Ryan the podcast has over 1000 subscribers. That pretty insane. Anyway, tonight was our official premiere on the show.

It was by far probably our best Gunshow in over a year. It was fun, loose and funny. And YES it was retardedly filth. There was fisting jokes, peeing and killing, too. But one thing that has been said about Gunshow before is that, if anything, we do crazy and dirty so well that it's not like we're using it as a crutch but rather just naturally as anything else. I use that compliment to cover my shame.

Basic show breakdown. - Suggestion "Promotion"
1) Ashley gives a guy a promotion. He wasn't more. Wants her job, too. He gets a prize.
2) 2 guys are peeing in a bathroom they must deal with a troll who lives there
3) a guy wins a free coke. Coke sends a guy to congratulate him and that guy kills everyone for no reason. Later the winner is getting an award. The award give disebowels himself.
4) A man is forced to choose between his fiances love and leaving forever. The test is to stick your arm in a tree that has a monster that will kill you. It bites him. Another man is bitten. In heaven Pete is complaining because this lady is leading to too many deaths.
5) A man complains about how no one puts people down at funerals. 2 men come forward to share horrible stories with the man about his dead mom.
6) I forget what happened but you can see it on the podcast!

After the show we went out for food. I hung out mainly with Trent and his lady friend, Dora. Being the dad of a 3 year old that name has connotations I am sure she doesn't care to hear for the umpteenth time. We ate and drank and I talked myself hoarse with my usual flair for filth. Good times. Ryan and I bonded over the fact that we did a scene that was basically ripped out of the early 80's sci-fi bomb Flash Gordon. I am pretty sure NO ONE knew what the fuc we were doing but I knew exactly what the hell was going on 5 words into the scene. "Oh this is that weird tree with the monster in it. okay!"

I ended the night with a train ride home watching the Office on my iPod. The audio is out of sync in an annoying way so I just watch the show generally and don't look at the mouths.